Moving beyond past trauma
Are you finding ways to move beyond past trauma?
It’s happened a dozen or more times in the past two weeks - in my own little world 🌎, so it makes me wonder if it’s happening in yours too.
The conversation starts in typical fashion: How are you doing these days? The response comes breezily: I’m actually doing really well. Pause. Then the voice drops an octave. ⬇ Except for everything that’s happening in the world. Dot, dot, dot… I’ve heard the same sentiment again and again, sometimes verbatim. Depending on the person, this is followed by a deep sigh, a shaking head, a steady gaze, or an angry rant. But it always includes a shared acknowledgement of the social and societal upheaval of late. 🥹
Today, I’m curious about the first part of the response, because it’s true for me too. I’m actually doing really well. I’m sometimes surprised by it and wonder if it is ok to feel good when the world is falling apart. When so many people are living in fear. When there’s so much instability.
Most days, the majority of my interactions are with fellow survivors. Most, if not all of us get triggered by decisions and actions coming from the White House because they follow the very same patterns used in the cultic environments that we are working so hard to put behind us.
There’s an excellent article in this month’s Psychology Today titled: Don’t Be a Victim of Your Past with the subtitle put aside your victimhood and move beyond your past trauma. Easy to say, isn't it? It posits that instead of learned helplessness, it’s possible to learn hopefulness. Pointing to a variety of research and weaving in multiple well regarded expert quotes, it lays a compelling foundation for moving forward after being walloped by trauma. 💫
Today I’m wondering if there’s the beginning of a new pattern emerging - one that’s built on the resilience of survivors (and others) who are savvy to the dynamics of coercive control. A pattern of well-being that allows us to step out of victim blaming and pointing fingers because we’ve prioritized healing and self-care. Is it possible that we're stronger than we think we are, at least some of the time?
I’m curious what you are experiencing. Does any of this resonate or no? How are you feeling these days? Are you celebrating any personal gains in moving beyond the traumas of the past despite the triggers of today?
I’d love to hear your thoughts. Just comment below!
Warm regards,
Gerette
PS Here's a link to that Psychology Today article. Enjoy. I hope that it will challenge and inspire you, as it did me.
PSS This week's Writing to Reckon class is full, but there are openings in upcoming classes. Writing is such an accessible way to reckon with past trauma. I'd love to see you there. REGISTER
